A charity employee with incurable cancer has recalled the bittersweet moment when she surprised her husband by renewing his marriage vows on his 40th birthday, knowing that her time in combination is running out.
Sally Steadman-South, 40, learned in May 2017 that her skin cancer was incurable and has since lived each and every day as if it were the last.
She toured Europe and Thailand with her circle of relatives and celebrated her 40th birthday in February with a party for 120 people, where she also promised her word once to her husband, Chris, 40.
First diagnosed with level one melanoma, a competitive skin cancer, in February 2014, despite the extensive remedy, 3 years later discovered that it was level 4 and incurable, and after the immunotherapy remedy could not prevent spread, there was only one option left, to take targeted drugs without any guarantee of prolonged suppression of the disease.
Sally, from Sheffield, who has two children, Ted, 11, and Florence, nine, lately has no cancer, but if the drugs, dabrafenib and vemurafenib, which are designed to inhibit the spread of cancer cells in patients like her, prevent them from working. , you will have no other options for remedy.
She said: “I don’t have cancer, but I still have a fatal disease. I have been taking those medications for over two years, which is because I have been told that other people have horrible side effects and usually avoid running after six to ten months, but they can become useless at any time.
“I spent a lot of time at first wondering, “Is this my last Christmas, it’s my last birthday, it’s the last time I’m going to sing my kids a happy birthday?”
She added: “But within six months of starting with targeted drugs in July, I had my first perfectly transparent research and have had it ever since.”
Despite three tests a month and checks to see if her cancer has returned, Sally refuses to be beaten, rather than appreciating every minute of every day and making her life a long adventure.
She said: “During this time, I have created memories with my family. We all went to Thailand and spent six weeks traveling around Europe in a motorhome. I reached the 40s, a vital milestone, and Chris and I renewed our marriage vows.
She added, “It’s vital for us to create memories because we just don’t know how long they all gave us together.”
Sally, who seeks the call for publication by the Cancer Research Institute (ICR) to push for investment to inject into studies that have been reduced through the Covid-19 pandemic, discovered for the first time the appearance of converting a mole into it. left breast in early 2013.
“As far as I know, I’ve had this mole, yet I’ve noticed it’s getting darker and more visual, it looks like a Coco Pop,” he says.
He showed it to his GP, who didn’t think it would look sinister but, over the next few months, Sally became concerned, especially when the mole began to bleed.
Returning to surgery, the doctor agreed to refer her to a specialist and in January 2014 she noticed through a dermatologist at the Royal Hallamshire Hospital in Sheffield, who agreed to biopsy, or check the tissue, of the mole.
When, a few weeks later, he was told he had level one melanoma, a type of skin cancer caused by sun exposure, according to the NHS, which can spread to other organs in the body, was in a state of shock.
“Despite the stress of seeing a specialist, I didn’t think it would be cancer,” he says. “I don’t know what caused it, but when I was younger, I took dangers and went to the sun loungers.
“But I’ve never made the connection between using sun loungers and skin cancer. Knowing what I know now, I can’t, the sun loungers are still on the streets.
“Although I feel a little like Russian roulette and it may have happened to anyone.”
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She added: “I tried not to worry too much. At the time, I wasn’t really aware of skin cancer. For me, it wasn’t like prostate or breast cancer, which can be cured, so there was no genuine concern. . “
In April 2014, Sally underwent a giant local excision, a one-hour procedure to eliminate the skin lesion, and a surrounding margin of normal-looking skin near where the mole was.
Fortunately, the noninvasive operation, meaning he didn’t want to have plastic surgery afterwards, was good luck and his cancer cells were removed.
After that, his 3 monthly exams were the only intrusion into his family’s overall life.
But in September 2016, Sally’s balance broke after a dream while on vacation in a circle of relatives in Cornwall.
“One night I had the weirdest dream of having a golf ball on my arm and took it off because it hurt,” he says. “In the morning I woke up and felt a lump on my left arm.
Leaving aside her fears until she returned home, she saw her GP, who sent her to Royal Hallamshire, where she underwent an ultrasound and biopsy.
Unfortunately, the effects showed that his melanoma had returned, was now at level 3 and had spread to his lymph nodes.
“I was devastated, as if the floor had ripped beneath me, ” he said.
Derived from Western Park Hospital in Sheffield, Sally had her lymph nodes removed.
At the same time, the BRAF gene mutation, which can convert cancer into mobiles in general and hereditary, has been tested, can be caused by environmental points or an error occurring in the division of the mobile frame.
The test test came back positive but has not been genetically tested, so you don’t know if it’s an inherited gene or if the gene has evolved due to other factors.
If positive control meant that Sally could, in the future, take targeted drugs to suppress cancer, it also means she doesn’t know if her children bring the gene.
She said: “I’m afraid the gene will possibly be passed on to my children. To be honest, that’s my biggest concern.
“My children have part of my genes, and even if they don’t turn out to be genetic, they still have my skin type. I take all the necessary precautions and if they have moles, I have them checked immediately. I know it’s weird, however, I need you to be as alert and aware as possible.”
After genetics and surgery, Sally received six weeks of radiation treatment consistent with the day.
“It was terrible, my skin started to have blisters and it hurt,” she says.
“To sleep, I had to leave the fan on all night because my body was boiling.”
Unfortunately, exhausting radiation therapy failed and Sally suffered from repeated local recurrent melanoma, where cancer cells form near the original tumor.
Then, in May 2017, there was devastating news.
“I was in the exercise and I felt a tension in my neck and shoulders,” Sally said. “I felt another lump in my neck and at the same time I felt a natural panic.”
An MRI and CT scan later that month at Western Park Hospital showed that he had discovered more cancer and that his melanoma had progressed to level four, meaning that it had not only spread to other parts of the body, but was incurable.
“I fell to the ground and my husband had to get me out of the room,” she said. “It was an emotional turmoil that I couldn’t even describe. The thought of not being there for my kids killed me inside.
When she decided not to have additional surgery because it was too complicated and, because the cancer had already spread, it would not save her tumor, Sally began immunotherapy in May 2017, a type of remedy that relies on the patient’s immune formula to help kill. cancer cells.
But she suffered terrible side effects (colitis, chronic digestive disease and treatment-related hepatitis) and was forced to prevent for a few months before resuming immunotherapy every 3 weeks from November 2017.
More bad news followed in February 2018, according to Sally, who said: “Doctors found that immunotherapy was not working and that the cancer had spread to her breasts and lymph nodes near the liver.
Knowing that she had the BRAF gene, Sally’s only option to take targeted medications, hopefully, to prolong her life.
She said her new medications were only effective for about six to ten months, and she was delighted when, after a few weeks of taking 3 tablets in the morning and two in the evening, her fitness took a step significantly, leading her to be declared cancer. -free. July 2018.
Although she is grateful to doctors for prolonging her life, she has no idea how long her medications will continue to be effective and she has not wasted a moment of her time.
In the summer of 2018, she, her husband and their children spent six weeks travelling around Europe (France, Switzerland, Germany and Spain) in a motorhome.
Sally said: “The children enjoyed it. Florence is a general adventurer, so she’s in her element.
Then, on the Easter holiday of 2019, they flew to Thailand to live the adventure of a lifetime.
“It was fantastic, ” said Sally. “We stayed with the elephants and cared for them, explore the rainforests, dive and visit islands and temples.
Then, that summer, they returned to Europe, securing in Austria.
“We went to a ski hotel in Austria, which had become a sleigh track for the summer, so we can fly uphill,” he says.
And on February 26 this year, Sally celebrated her birthday.
“I know that being 40 is a big challenge for anyone,” he says. “But when I started with targeted drugs, I thought, “I need to be 40, ” so it was very special for me.
“We rented a local social club room and invited about 120 visitors because I didn’t need it to be an unhappy occasion, I was looking for it to be a big party.”
And he had an extra wonder for Chris, whom he married in 2006.
She said: “He sought to renew our vows since I was sick. But I didn’t need it, because I felt like we were doing it out of desperation or worry about not surviving.”
“When I got to 40, I was in another mental space, however, and I felt we would do it just to show our love for others, not for some other reason.
“I didn’t even tell the kids what I had planned a few moments before. Then came the recorder and I thought, “Chris, we’re renewing our vows, here, now.”
She added: “He choked a little, but I already had a speech ready for my birthday, so she said anything in the direction of what I had planned, and I had written my vows.”
“It was, honestly, such a magical moment and then there were some tears, however, we threw all the chairs back and celebrated in the evening.
It was a perfectly scheduled birthday party just before the close of Covid-19, at which Sally was heard for 4 months, although fortunately her remedy plan remained unchanged.
With the lockdown loosening, Sally and her circle of relatives plan to return to Europe next year, as long as it stays healthy.
But for now, she’s satisfied just to see her children take her steps.
“Ted starts high school in September, so I’m actually looking forward to seeing him from day one,” he says. “With Florence, I just need to be here as long as I can to see her become a teenager and then a woman.
She concluded: “But my biggest ambition is to be here for plays at school, sporting days and watching them laugh, just the fundamental things I didn’t think I could do.
“Whatever happens, I need my kids not to forget that their mom was there for them.”
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Sally, whose existing remedy can only be obtained through ICR research, is also willing to boost aid to charity.
Professor Paul Workman, executive director of ICR, said: “The coronavirus pandemic has been a fundamental setback.
“We are asking for important ones to premiere these pictures and help us recover the hours of study we have lost.
“We know that cancer patients around the world depend on us to provide them with new remedies that give even other people with complex diseases the possibility of a much longer and better life.”
You can receive more information about ICR by visiting their website.